August 16, 2002, 07:31
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#61
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One of his pious friends heard her wrong, looked at her in horror and said, "but Sister Miriam, you are to be chaste!"
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August 16, 2002, 16:03
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#62
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It was then that Pigtree Olliphant-Jones lifted the Believer banner on high, and slammed it down onto his own toe, before removing it, and sticking into the ground (and commencing to jump around in circles holding his foot and saying "Ow, Ow, Ow..."), claiming it as Believer territory.
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August 16, 2002, 16:10
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#63
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Then one of the authors noticed that he had made a most embarrassing typo in his earlier post and had written "his pious friends" instead of "her pious friends", therefore, after questioning the purity of Sister Miriam, questioned her gender - and the perception of the readers - as well.
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August 16, 2002, 16:20
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#64
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A rock then bounced off the said writer's forehead, and the story continued, as Yang finally released his pinky, only to get his thumb caught by the same device.
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August 16, 2002, 20:10
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#65
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"What's going on?!" asked Deirdre, reaching out in the dark and hearing a scream as she poked someone in the eye.
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August 16, 2002, 23:59
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#66
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"I don't know, I can't see a thing" screamed the pokee holding his/her eye as s/he writhed in politically correct pain.
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August 17, 2002, 10:49
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#67
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"Well, I don't like it," continued Deirde, "it's so dark...and Yang is singing 'I'm the Great Pretender' again..."
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August 17, 2002, 11:20
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#68
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The author, now having a nasty dent in his forehead and half blind, promptly proceeded to shoot himself to rid himself of the story, only to miss his head by some two feets and killing Yang in a frenzy of complete and utter absurdity.
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Last edited by Kassiopeia; August 17, 2002 at 11:25.
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August 17, 2002, 11:30
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#69
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Yang coughed and fell to the ground, preparing to say something really really deep, before he realized that the shot had bounced off his body armor and collided into the poor, poked-in-the-eye individual, and so he began to sing: "I em de gweat pwetenda...pwetendan I'm doong whale!"
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August 17, 2002, 11:34
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#70
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Appalled that he wasn't a person able enough to even rid himself from this plane of existence, the writer finally disappeared from the ship as the bulkhead gave way to stress and opened up for a millisecond, allowing the air pressure to blow the hapless author out to deep space, where asphyxiation, or optionally burning to ashes in the atmosphere of Chiron, awaited him.
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August 17, 2002, 12:11
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#71
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Deirdre, sick of this buffoonery, came along and gave the writer a good sock in the jaw, to which he responded, "Thanks...I needed that."
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August 17, 2002, 12:21
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#72
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"Well, this is just nice, now this has no sense at all, I mean how could you Deirdre wander off to freakin' SPACE to hit me, can you tell me that, milady", the writer asked, while remaining somewhat flushed due to the 'gentle' touch of the lady - and apparently not stuck in deep space facing certain death, like any other sucky authors should be.
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Last edited by Kassiopeia; August 17, 2002 at 12:26.
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August 17, 2002, 12:51
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#73
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"Well, darn it all," replied Deirdre (after giving the writer another sock in the jaw, compliments of History Guy), "if you've noticed, we've landed, and we haven't actually left the pod, and so I have no idea what on earth you are going on about."
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August 17, 2002, 14:48
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#74
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"Stop hitting me, it's making me... aroused."
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August 17, 2002, 16:21
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#75
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After hearing this, Yang stopped his singing and walked over and wacked the writer on the head and locked him in a trunk, and immediately afterward, the story commenced moving along.
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August 17, 2002, 17:27
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#76
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"So", Lal said, looking through the plexiglass window at the surface of the planet, "we're here, on Chiron, four lightyears away from home - I wonder if you can breathe the air outside?"
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August 17, 2002, 17:43
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#77
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"I'll go see!" cried a Peacekeeper, who ran out, and quickly ran back in, his face blue, saying "No, darn it, let's get out the air masks, OK?!"
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Last edited by History Guy; August 17, 2002 at 17:49.
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August 17, 2002, 17:57
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#78
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"But we left the gas masks onboard Unity, and took the ship's stores of chocolate chip cookies and milk with us instead", Lal screamed.
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August 17, 2002, 19:59
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#79
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Morgan, who was getting a little worried, asked, "But Pravin, my friend...whose decision was it to leave the masks in favor of the cookies and milk?!"
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August 17, 2002, 20:54
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#80
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"Well, let's see, there are seventeen UN Executives for Environmental Protection, fifteen UN Executives for Refreshments, another twelve on the UN Committee for Fairness in Committee-Building, and fifteen UN Fairness Observers for the Committee for Fairness in Committee-Building, so . . . I suppose it could have been anyone."
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August 18, 2002, 03:03
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#81
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Zakharov, who had drunk a few too many electricuted potatoes was now thoroughly intoxicated was quite befuddled by the events taking place and starting singing "I'm the great pretender" with Yang.
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August 18, 2002, 10:17
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#82
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As Morgan banged Lal's head against a wall, Ulric Svensgaard, infuriated that Zakharov and Yang were singing a Doo Wop tune that he did not know, began singing, "You know they call me Speedo, but my real name is Mr. Earl!"
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August 18, 2002, 11:52
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#83
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Then, something completely (and, believe it or not, even more absurd then anything witnessed before) different happened.
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August 19, 2002, 01:23
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#84
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Judaa Marr, after crash landing on Planet, heard Zak & Yang's singing & was quite apalled that they didn't alter the sounds correctly, and proceeded to show them the correct way of singing "I'm the great pretender".
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August 19, 2002, 02:45
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#85
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"Who the hell is this ugly guy?" Zakharov wondered out loud.
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August 19, 2002, 08:02
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#86
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Story concept: strange - Progenitors: no sentences - Continuation: difficult - Great pretender: Judaa Marr - Ugly: relative concept.
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August 20, 2002, 06:44
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#87
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Svensgaard squinted his good eye at Zakharov and bellowed, "Just because I ain't never starred in no commericial doesn't mean I is ugly, baldy!"
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August 20, 2002, 10:48
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#88
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"I am not bald", Zakharov stated, "just 'challenged hair-wise'."
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August 20, 2002, 17:00
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#89
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Zakharov then said something to the effect of: "Well, at least I have these flowing locks back here...sort of...and look at Yang...now this guy has serious baldness here..."
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August 20, 2002, 17:06
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#90
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"Hair is not zen, comrades, therefore I have no bodily hair whatsoever."
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