March 7, 2003, 20:12
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#1
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Emperor
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We're Sorry America
I know I'll probably get flammed cuz of this one by you guys or Ming but I think its to hilariously true and I just had to post it!
Subject: We're sorry, America.
Courtesy of Rick Mercer from This Hour Has 22 Minutes CBC Television:
On behalf of Canadians everywhere I'd like to offer an apology to the United States of America. We haven't been getting along very well recently and for that, I am truly sorry.
I'm sorry we called George Bush a moron.
He is a moron but, it wasn't nice of us to point it out. If it's any consolation, the fact that he's a moron shouldn't reflect poorly on the people of America. After all it's not like you actually elected him.
I'm sorry about our softwood lumber. Just because we have more trees than you doesn't give us the right to sell you lumber that's cheaper and better than your own.
I'm sorry we beat you in Olympic hockey. In our defense I guess our excuse would be that our team was much, much, much, much better than yours.
I'm sorry we burnt down your white house during the war of 1812. I notice you've rebuilt it! It's Very Nice.
I'm sorry about your beer. I know we had nothing to do with your beer but, we Feel your Pain.
I'm sorry about our waffling on Iraq. I mean, when you're going up against a crazed dictator, you wanna have your friends by your side. I realize it took more than two years before you guys pitched in against
Hitler, but that was different. Everyone knew he had weapons.
And finally on behalf of all Canadians, I'm sorry that we're constantly apologizing for things in a passive-aggressive way which is really a thinly veiled criticism. I sincerely hope that you're not upset over this. We've seen what you do to countries you get upset
with.
Thank you.
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-Never argue with an idiot; He will bring you down to his level and beat you with experience.
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March 7, 2003, 20:13
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#2
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Emperor
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Been posted already.
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Tutto nel mondo è burla
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March 7, 2003, 20:16
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#3
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Emperor
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Scouse Git (2) LaFayette and Adam Smith you will be missed
"All my own perception of beauty both in majesty and simplicity is founded upon Our Lady." - JRR Tolkein
Get busy living or get busy dying.
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March 7, 2003, 20:17
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#4
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Prince
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Re: We're Sorry America
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March 7, 2003, 20:20
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#5
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Emperor
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and furthermore, nothing but mindless canadian penis/flag waving.
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March 7, 2003, 20:23
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#6
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Emperor
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Ooops, I didn't know it was already posted.
Roger that.
Close the thread anytime you want Ming.
Sorry.
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March 7, 2003, 21:04
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#7
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Deity
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Quote:
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We're Sorry America
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Yes, you are. 
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I make no bones about my moral support for [terrorist] organizations. - chegitz guevara
If government is big enough to give you everything you want, it is also big enough to take everything you have. - Gerald Ford
Blackwidow24 and FemmeAdonis fan club
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March 7, 2003, 21:19
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#8
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King
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i dont accept  give us all your virigins and then we can talk
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Kids, you tried your best and you failed miserably. The lesson is, never try. -Homer
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March 7, 2003, 21:36
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#9
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Emperor
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I agree with Apolyton's biggest jackass! 
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"Let the People know the facts and the country will be saved." Abraham Lincoln
Mis Novias
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March 7, 2003, 21:49
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#10
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Deity
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Quote:
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Originally posted by Azazel
and furthermore, nothing but mindless canadian penis/flag waving.
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I think a better eye for comedy and lampooning might be in order.
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March 7, 2003, 21:58
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#11
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Emperor
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You guys should apologize for getting in the way of our bombs. What the hell you were doing there I'll never know. It's not like Toronto was attacked.
Apologize for being bombed!
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March 7, 2003, 22:00
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#12
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Deity
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If we don't, will you bomb Toronto?
*Oh please, oh please, oh please*
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March 7, 2003, 22:00
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#13
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Local Time: 16:12
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Location: ACK!! PPHHHHTTBBBTTTT!!!
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Quote:
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Originally posted by notyoueither
I think a better eye for comedy and lampooning might be in order.
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Really. I mean, it's not like Canadians are really going to wave their penises(penii?). It's too damn cold up there.
 ACK!
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March 7, 2003, 22:02
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#14
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Emperor
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Quote:
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Originally posted by notyoueither
If we don't, will you bomb Toronto?
*Oh please, oh please, oh please*
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Hell no, we're oh for two attacking you frigid bastards. We know who we can take and who we can't.
Now please apologize for being bombed already.
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March 7, 2003, 22:03
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#15
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Deity
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That's why we have Canada day in July. February would result in too many childless families.
-20c outside today, btw.
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March 7, 2003, 22:07
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#16
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Deity
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Quote:
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Originally posted by Felch X
Hell no, we're oh for two attacking you frigid bastards. We know who we can take and who we can't.
Now please apologize for being bombed already.
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We are very sorry to have had to demonstrate the short comings of your system of activating National Guard units and giving them expensive and lethal toys to tool around in while stoned out of their gourds on speed.
How's that?
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March 7, 2003, 22:07
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#17
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Emperor
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Better
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March 7, 2003, 23:47
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#18
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Quote:
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Originally posted by notyoueither
If we don't, will you bomb Toronto?
*Oh please, oh please, oh please*
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I'd ask you to bomb Calgary, but it's an honorary part of the US anyways. Bloody pack of nazi traitors.
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March 8, 2003, 00:59
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#19
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Deity
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Ohh, Calgary would be good too!
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