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Old July 15, 2003, 07:49   #1
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Mafia Orders Hit on Cat
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MAFIA ORDERS HIT ON CAT (Sky)

The notoriously ruthless Russian mob is believed to have ordered a hit on a cat.

Rusik, Russia's only sniffer cat, was run over and killed by a car, the Daily Telegraph reports.

The feline crime-fighter had been the scourge of caviar smuggling gangs.

The cat was used by customs officials to sniff out sturgeon row concealed in cars at checkpoints on the lucrative smuggling route between the Caspian Sea and Moscow.

The Russian black market in caviar is estimated to be worth over £1bn and has provoked bloody feuds between powerful criminal gangs in the past.

It is believed that Rusik was targetted after his prowess was first made public last week.

Rusik had once discovered caviar in the car that hit him.

He first came into the possession of Russian customs officials last year when he wandered into a checkpoint as a stray kitten.

Police officer Sergei Kovalenko said his talent quickly became apparent: "One day Rusik just leapt into the boot of a passing car at the checkpoint and immediately sniffed out some sturgeon."

"After that, we decided to use him all the time."
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.... (UPI)
Rusik's demise was just the latest blow to Stavropol's crime-fighters. Another cat, Barsik, succumbed a few weeks ago after eating a poisoned mouse.


...



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Old July 15, 2003, 08:21   #2
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Russians are wierd.
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Old July 15, 2003, 08:26   #3
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This article is f*cking gold
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Old July 15, 2003, 10:00   #4
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well, i suppose it's a bit easier to off a cat than a person.

besides, their knees are small.
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Old July 15, 2003, 10:03   #5
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I saw this in the paper. Cats should really be ruling humans you know.
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Old July 15, 2003, 11:37   #6
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Quote:
Cats should really be ruling humans you know.
who says the aren't?

We feed them, and walk them and care for them, don't we?

(i saw this in a garfield cartoon feature)
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Old July 15, 2003, 11:43   #7
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What's next, a bomb in the scratching post?

this just says: don;t mess with the Russian Mob, they are crazy enough to take out cats! (hasn;t this sort of thing beeen done to drug sniffing dogs?)
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Old July 15, 2003, 11:55   #8
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Quote:
Originally posted by Sirotnikov
Quote:
Cats should really be ruling humans you know.
who says the aren't?

We feed them, and walk them and care for them, don't we?
Who the hell walks a cat?
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Old July 15, 2003, 11:59   #9
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More importantly, how the hell do you walk a cat? In my experience, once you put a leash on them, all you can do is drag a cat.

Why was the cat on a street someplace where he could be run over?
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Old July 15, 2003, 12:04   #10
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it's for people who really wanted dogs.

i wonder what peta will say about this?
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Old July 15, 2003, 12:07   #11
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Old July 15, 2003, 12:10   #12
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I really like cats

But then again, caviar smuggling shouldn't be illegal, so I can see the smugglers' point.
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Old July 15, 2003, 12:11   #13
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The reason caviar smuggling is illegal is because the beluga stugeon is an very endangered species. Or don't you believe in protecting endangered species?
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Old July 15, 2003, 12:13   #14
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I dunno. What do you think?
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Old July 15, 2003, 12:22   #15
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I say we intorduce DF to an endangared species of our choosing and allow them to debate the issue towards a full concluiosn. I say we chose a Siberian Tiger as the other participant.
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Old July 15, 2003, 12:22   #16
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If one person owned all the land in the world he'd have a perfect right to through the entire human species into the ocean and you'd be okay with that.
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Old July 15, 2003, 12:23   #17
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Hmmm....well, that'd be one way to control population growth....

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Old July 15, 2003, 12:24   #18
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Old July 15, 2003, 12:41   #19
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Quote:
Originally posted by chegitz guevara
If one person owned all the land in the world he'd have a perfect right to through the entire human species into the ocean and you'd be okay with that.
It happens anyway..............Ethnic Cleansing ..............the common man is powerless to stop it at its onset.
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Old July 15, 2003, 12:42   #20
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If one person owned all the land in the world he'd have a perfect right to through the entire human species into the ocean and you'd be okay with that.
Bullshit. Murder is wrong, even when done on your own property.
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Old July 15, 2003, 12:45   #21
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So he'd have to allow people to use his property?
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Old July 15, 2003, 12:48   #22
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It wouldn't be murder. If they choose not to swim, that's their own fault.

[/Libertarian looney]
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Old July 15, 2003, 20:18   #23
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Quote:
Originally posted by David Floyd


Bullshit. Murder is wrong, even when done on your own property.

IIRC there was a time when you argued that you had the right to shoot police officers if they ever tried to come onto your property. Or was that just a lot of talk?
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Old July 15, 2003, 20:19   #24
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Quote:
Originally posted by David Floyd
I dunno. What do you think?
So one private party has the right to wipe out a resource he doesn't own on property that's not his? Interesting interpretation.
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Old July 15, 2003, 21:22   #25
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I got two cats. One is very much a Dog-cat, he'll come when called, fetch, even walk with you (with a harness)

The other, B*tch Kitty from Hell, doesn't respond to any commands, whether they be " Come", "stop", "Mary stop it", "FOR THE LOVE OF CHRIST STOP!"
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Old July 15, 2003, 21:31   #26
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Quote:
Who the hell walks a cat?
The Russians are very good at training cats. I've seen videos of trained Russky felines doing all sorts of tricks, jumping through hoops, walking tightropes, and the like. Must be a secret technology the USSR developed back when they were feverishly researching ESP during the Cold War.
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Old July 15, 2003, 22:23   #27
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Quote:
Originally posted by mindseye
Quote:
Who the hell walks a cat?
The Russians are very good at training cats. I've seen videos of trained Russky felines doing all sorts of tricks, jumping through hoops, walking tightropes, and the like. Must be a secret technology the USSR developed back when they were feverishly researching ESP during the Cold War.
Which is another reason Sloww should fear me.

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Old July 15, 2003, 22:25   #28
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Quote:
Originally posted by Boris Godunov
Who the hell walks a cat?
My cat walks when she gets tired of being dragged...by her tail.


Seriously, she gets plenty of exercise outdoors without the fuss of "taking her for walks."
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Old July 15, 2003, 22:25   #29
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Quote:
It wouldn't be murder. If they choose not to swim, that's their own fault.
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Old July 15, 2003, 22:41   #30
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Quote:
Originally posted by Lonestar
I got two cats. One is very much a Dog-cat, he'll come when called, fetch, even walk with you (with a harness)

The other, B*tch Kitty from Hell, doesn't respond to any commands, whether they be " Come", "stop", "Mary stop it", "FOR THE LOVE OF CHRIST STOP!"
My cat won't respond to "Samantha," "Sam," "Cat," "Kitty," or "Ouch!"



...But she responds to, "Stupid."

Dumb cat... ...but I LOOOVE my pritty (sic) kitty.
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