September 15, 2003, 15:03
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#1
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King
Local Time: 08:47
Local Date: November 2, 2010
Join Date: Oct 2002
Location: Birmingham, AL
Posts: 1,595
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Help with Japanese culture
My cousing is getting married this weekend to a girl from Japan. I know absolutely nothing about Japanese culture that I didn't learn from stereotypes and anime. I really would like to make her feel welcome to our family; does anyone have any suggestions that will keep me from making a total *** out of myself?
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September 15, 2003, 15:19
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#2
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King
Local Time: 09:47
Local Date: November 2, 2010
Join Date: May 2000
Location: Belgium
Posts: 1,506
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Post this on a Japanese forum.
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veni vidi PWNED!
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September 15, 2003, 15:24
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#3
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Warlord
Local Time: 09:47
Local Date: November 2, 2010
Join Date: Dec 2002
Location: Germany
Posts: 196
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Dont alter you behavior to suit the supposed diffrence of that girl. It always sucks if you are in some foreign country and as soon the locals find out where you are from, they try to be nice and caring about your culture, instead of behaving ****ing normal 
__________________
If its no fun why do it? Dance like noone is watching...
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September 15, 2003, 15:27
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#4
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King
Local Time: 08:47
Local Date: November 2, 2010
Join Date: Oct 2002
Location: Birmingham, AL
Posts: 1,595
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That would be a great idea! One thought, though... I don't speak Japanese! Since this is Off-Topic, and we have Japanese nationals that participate on this forum, I figured this was as good a place as any to ask.
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September 15, 2003, 15:29
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#5
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Emperor
Local Time: 04:47
Local Date: November 2, 2010
Join Date: Jun 2000
Location: Fort LOLderdale, FL Communist Party of Apolyton
Posts: 9,091
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Give her a scale model of the Enola Gay. 
__________________
Christianity: The belief that a cosmic Jewish Zombie who was his own father can make you live forever if you symbolically eat his flesh and telepathically tell him you accept him as your master, so he can remove an evil force from your soul that is present in humanity because a rib-woman was convinced by a talking snake to eat from a magical tree...
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September 15, 2003, 15:33
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#6
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King
Local Time: 08:47
Local Date: November 2, 2010
Join Date: Oct 2002
Location: Birmingham, AL
Posts: 1,595
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Quote:
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Give her a scale model of the Enola Gay.
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I figured I'd just keep calling her Korean then ask her to lay some rail tracks...
I guess I just don't want to be a freak. She's painfully shy and already nervous.
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September 15, 2003, 15:34
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#7
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Emperor
Local Time: 08:47
Local Date: November 2, 2010
Join Date: Jun 2002
Location: Mu Mu Land
Posts: 6,570
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If she bows to you don't try and look down her shirt.
by the way my name is not a racial slur + a pronoun... I always think of it as Jaffer, but anyway, don't introduce her to me JAP her. 
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September 15, 2003, 15:51
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#8
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Deity
Local Time: 04:47
Local Date: November 2, 2010
Join Date: Dec 1969
Location: Not your daddy's Benjamins
Posts: 10,737
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Quote:
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She's painfully shy and already nervous.
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So she fits the stereotype!
I would also suggest that you just behave as you would to somebody in the States. Dumb questions and everything. Apparently, she is already sufficiently comfortable with the way your cuz acts. And if she isn't comfortable with you, then at least your cuz will be able to tell her that this is the way you normally treat people. 
__________________
I came upon a barroom full of bad Salon pictures in which men with hats on the backs of their heads were wolfing food from a counter. It was the institution of the "free lunch" I had struck. You paid for a drink and got as much as you wanted to eat. For something less than a rupee a day a man can feed himself sumptuously in San Francisco, even though he be a bankrupt. Remember this if ever you are stranded in these parts. ~ Rudyard Kipling, 1891
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September 15, 2003, 15:56
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#9
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King
Local Time: 08:47
Local Date: November 2, 2010
Join Date: Oct 2002
Location: Birmingham, AL
Posts: 1,595
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True enough.
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September 15, 2003, 15:59
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#10
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Deity
Local Time: 04:47
Local Date: November 2, 2010
Join Date: Dec 1969
Location: Not your daddy's Benjamins
Posts: 10,737
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Besides, if you act all nice-nice, but it comes across weird, then you have to act weird whenever you see her. Major downer.
__________________
I came upon a barroom full of bad Salon pictures in which men with hats on the backs of their heads were wolfing food from a counter. It was the institution of the "free lunch" I had struck. You paid for a drink and got as much as you wanted to eat. For something less than a rupee a day a man can feed himself sumptuously in San Francisco, even though he be a bankrupt. Remember this if ever you are stranded in these parts. ~ Rudyard Kipling, 1891
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September 15, 2003, 16:06
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#11
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Prince
Local Time: 09:47
Local Date: November 2, 2010
Join Date: Dec 2000
Location: in perpetuity
Posts: 4,962
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Don't blow your nose in public; remove your shoes when entering a house (facing inwards I think, maybe sideways to be safe), and put on toilet shoes to go to the toilet if they've provided; don't stick your chopsticks vertically into your rice; never complement any rice apart from Japanese rice; eat everything they give you, whether it's wriggling or not; be prepared to go out drinking 'til 3am every night.
__________________
Concrete, Abstract, or Squoingy?
"I don't believe in giving scripting languages because the only additional power they give users is the power to create bugs." - Mike Breitkreutz, Firaxis
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September 15, 2003, 16:10
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#12
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King
Local Time: 08:47
Local Date: November 2, 2010
Join Date: Oct 2002
Location: Birmingham, AL
Posts: 1,595
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Quote:
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be prepared to go out drinking 'til 3am every night
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Ah! Finally something I can identify with! Unfortunately, Sakato is a teetotaler and very anti-alcohol.
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September 15, 2003, 16:30
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#13
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King
Local Time: 08:47
Local Date: November 2, 2010
Join Date: Jul 2002
Location: Go sneer at that cow creamer!
Posts: 1,305
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Quote:
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Originally posted by DanielXY
Dont alter you behavior to suit the supposed diffrence of that girl. It always sucks if you are in some foreign country and as soon the locals find out where you are from, they try to be nice and caring about your culture, instead of behaving ****ing normal
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I HATE when people do that. Just act normal, with a little patience mixed in.
__________________
cIV list: cheats
Now watch this drive!
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September 15, 2003, 16:33
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#14
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Emperor
Local Time: 10:47
Local Date: November 2, 2010
Join Date: Aug 1999
Location: Aarhus, Denmark
Posts: 3,618
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What is it with asians and alcohol.
My wife is totally anti-alcohol too. Not because of conviction but because she just doesn't like the stuff.
I really wouldn't care about this, except for the fact that I like red-wine so much.
Asmodean
__________________
Im not sure what Baruk Khazad is , but if they speak Judeo-Dwarvish, that would be "blessed are the dwarves" - lord of the mark
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September 15, 2003, 16:38
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#15
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Emperor
Local Time: 00:47
Local Date: November 2, 2010
Join Date: Jun 2000
Location: In the land of the one-eyed
Posts: 3,262
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Give a small gift (a big gift is embarassing).
Be polite and not too loud.
Learn some basic Japanese...I'll do some phonetic for you:
ha jee may mah-shtay, do zo your oh shee coo
Is basically the equivalent of "very nice to meet you" in a formal way.
Do mo arigato go zay mas ta is formal thank you.
Etc....good luck...she's just a regular gal, I'm sure.
__________________
Life and death is a grave matter;
all things pass quickly away.
Each of you must be completely alert;
never neglectful, never indulgent.
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September 15, 2003, 16:40
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#16
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Deity
Local Time: 04:47
Local Date: November 2, 2010
Join Date: Dec 1969
Location: Not your daddy's Benjamins
Posts: 10,737
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I was actually the only representative from our family that made it over to my brother's wedding in Munich to his German fiance. Besides my brother, I was the only American out of ~ 200 guests.
I have to admit that it was a little intimidating. First and only time I have danced the waltz. Can't speak a word of German.
Where is this wedding being held? State-side or in Japan?
__________________
I came upon a barroom full of bad Salon pictures in which men with hats on the backs of their heads were wolfing food from a counter. It was the institution of the "free lunch" I had struck. You paid for a drink and got as much as you wanted to eat. For something less than a rupee a day a man can feed himself sumptuously in San Francisco, even though he be a bankrupt. Remember this if ever you are stranded in these parts. ~ Rudyard Kipling, 1891
Last edited by DanS; September 15, 2003 at 16:46.
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September 15, 2003, 16:41
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#17
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Emperor
Local Time: 04:47
Local Date: November 2, 2010
Join Date: Mar 1999
Location: San Antonio, TX
Posts: 4,264
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Quote:
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Originally posted by Immortal Wombat
...never complement any rice apart from Japanese rice
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"Man, this Uncle Bens is the ****! It especially goes good with Kikomans soy sauce!"
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September 15, 2003, 16:47
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#18
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King
Local Time: 08:47
Local Date: November 2, 2010
Join Date: Oct 2002
Location: Birmingham, AL
Posts: 1,595
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The wedding's in Arkansas. She won't have any family here. As a family, we tend to be over enthusiastic when greeting new members of the clan.
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Quote:
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"Man, this Uncle Bens is the ****! It especially goes good with Kikomans soy sauce!"
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You're gonna end up getting shot, roundeye.
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September 15, 2003, 17:03
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#19
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Deity
Local Time: 04:47
Local Date: November 2, 2010
Join Date: Dec 1969
Location: Not your daddy's Benjamins
Posts: 10,737
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Overenthusiastic? Could you tell a story or two so that we can get the whole picture?
__________________
I came upon a barroom full of bad Salon pictures in which men with hats on the backs of their heads were wolfing food from a counter. It was the institution of the "free lunch" I had struck. You paid for a drink and got as much as you wanted to eat. For something less than a rupee a day a man can feed himself sumptuously in San Francisco, even though he be a bankrupt. Remember this if ever you are stranded in these parts. ~ Rudyard Kipling, 1891
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September 15, 2003, 17:07
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#20
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King
Local Time: 08:47
Local Date: November 2, 2010
Join Date: Oct 2002
Location: Birmingham, AL
Posts: 1,595
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Well, when I first brought my wife, then girlfriend, over to my parent's house for Thanksgiving dinner for the first time, she was swept into a whirlwind of activity. Each of my relatives were telling her jokes, relating family secrets, yelling at each other in a semijovial fashion while trying to monopolize time with her. They were just trying to make her feel like she fit in but it so completely overwhelmed her that it took almost a year before I could get her back around my family again.
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September 16, 2003, 01:39
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#21
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Deity
Local Time: 04:47
Local Date: November 2, 2010
Join Date: Oct 2001
Location: In the closet...
Posts: 10,604
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Quote:
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and we have Japanese nationals that participate on this forum
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No we don't, as far as I know.
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Quote:
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She's painfully shy and already nervous.
So she fits the stereotype!
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Yep.
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Quote:
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remove your shoes when entering a house (facing inwards I think, maybe sideways to be safe)
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Toes pointed toward the door.
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Quote:
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What is it with asians and alcohol.
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They're missing an enzyme Europeans have that breaks down alcohol. That's why they get drunk so easily.
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Do mo arigato go zay mas ta is formal thank you.
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She's his family, not the Emperor. "Arigatou" should suffice. If she's from Kansai, break out the "okini" and she will adore you.
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Quote:
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It especially goes good with Kikomans soy sauce!
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Kikkoman is the leading soy sauce company in Japan as well.
That's all. You should be fine, Harry. Even if you do make a gaffe, she'll more than likely let it slide since you're a gaijin.
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KH FOR OWNER!
ASHER FOR CEO!!
GUYNEMER FOR OT MOD!!!
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September 16, 2003, 01:43
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#22
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PolyCast Thread Necromancer
Local Time: 08:47
Local Date: November 2, 2010
Join Date: Jul 2002
Location: We are all Asher now.
Posts: 1,437
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Ki mi ga -- yo -- wa! Ye cho yi -- -- ya chi yo ni, sa za re, i shi no! I wa oo to na re te, ko ke no..mu -- su -- ma -- -- de!!!
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September 16, 2003, 01:43
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#23
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Deity
Local Time: 04:47
Local Date: November 2, 2010
Join Date: Oct 2001
Location: In the closet...
Posts: 10,604
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I hate that song...
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KH FOR OWNER!
ASHER FOR CEO!!
GUYNEMER FOR OT MOD!!!
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September 16, 2003, 17:21
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#24
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PolyCast Thread Necromancer
Local Time: 08:47
Local Date: November 2, 2010
Join Date: Jul 2002
Location: We are all Asher now.
Posts: 1,437
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Wanna translate it for me?
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September 16, 2003, 19:44
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#25
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Deity
Local Time: 04:47
Local Date: November 2, 2010
Join Date: Dec 1969
Location: Not your daddy's Benjamins
Posts: 10,737
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Quote:
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No we don't, as far as I know.
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Doesn't DaShi have Japanese parents or something?
__________________
I came upon a barroom full of bad Salon pictures in which men with hats on the backs of their heads were wolfing food from a counter. It was the institution of the "free lunch" I had struck. You paid for a drink and got as much as you wanted to eat. For something less than a rupee a day a man can feed himself sumptuously in San Francisco, even though he be a bankrupt. Remember this if ever you are stranded in these parts. ~ Rudyard Kipling, 1891
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September 16, 2003, 20:14
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#26
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Deity
Local Time: 04:47
Local Date: November 2, 2010
Join Date: Oct 2001
Location: In the closet...
Posts: 10,604
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Quote:
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Doesn't DaShi have Japanese parents or something?
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I don't really know. He was the only one I wasn't sure about, but I seem to remember him not being Japanese (or at least a Japanese national) for some reason. I could be wrong, however.
__________________
KH FOR OWNER!
ASHER FOR CEO!!
GUYNEMER FOR OT MOD!!!
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September 16, 2003, 20:41
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#27
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Deity
Local Time: 04:47
Local Date: November 2, 2010
Join Date: Dec 1969
Location: Not your daddy's Benjamins
Posts: 10,737
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I was under the impression that he's American. But his posting style is rather... ummm... brief. Almost like DinoDoc's.
__________________
I came upon a barroom full of bad Salon pictures in which men with hats on the backs of their heads were wolfing food from a counter. It was the institution of the "free lunch" I had struck. You paid for a drink and got as much as you wanted to eat. For something less than a rupee a day a man can feed himself sumptuously in San Francisco, even though he be a bankrupt. Remember this if ever you are stranded in these parts. ~ Rudyard Kipling, 1891
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September 16, 2003, 20:56
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#28
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King
Local Time: 04:47
Local Date: November 2, 2010
Join Date: Jul 1999
Location: of Meridian Hill, Washington D.C.
Posts: 1,383
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Harry,
I'm sure she will love him long time
ack!
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September 22, 2003, 14:20
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#29
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King
Local Time: 08:47
Local Date: November 2, 2010
Join Date: Oct 2002
Location: Birmingham, AL
Posts: 1,595
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Update:
Satoko has been thoroughly Americanized. She still doesn't speak very good english but by the end of this weekend she had driven a truck, ridden horses, wrecked a truck, fed farm animals, pulled meat from a pit cooked hog, and been drug behind a speedboat at thirty miles per hour on an innertube. Plus, she got married in red, white, and blue sandals and can dance like The King. Good times.
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September 22, 2003, 15:00
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#30
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Deity
Local Time: 04:47
Local Date: November 2, 2010
Join Date: Jul 2001
Location: Kneel before Grog!
Posts: 17,978
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Quote:
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Satoko has been thoroughly Americanized. She still doesn't speak very good english but by the end of this weekend she had driven a truck, ridden horses, wrecked a truck, fed farm animals, pulled meat from a pit cooked hog, and been drug behind a speedboat at thirty miles per hour on an innertube. Plus, she got married in red, white, and blue sandals and can dance like The King. Good times.
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Wrecked a truck?
-Arrian
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The trick isn't to break some eggs to make an omelette, it's convincing the eggs to break themselves in order to aspire to omelettehood.
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